"Squeeze my Lemon til the juice runs down my leg!"

Before we get back to the Greg Camarillo Pants Party (yea, we’re gonna milk this shit for all it’s worth), I need to pass along some news items. Because as a blogger, I am bound by law to do this every now and then. Otherwise, it’s a trial by a Tribunal of Bloggers with the possibility of facing a punishment of having to watch an endless loop of a Dane Cook performance for 52 straight hours Clockwork Orange style. So, here we go....

*I failed to mention this but we had a huge response from you people when Ted Ginn Jr. was up for the Diet Pepsi Rookie of the week back in November. I told you to vote. You did. Within the hour, he shot up the ranks and took that bitch. True story. Sorry I forgot to give you guys props and a shout out and all the other hipster things you say to someone when they have achieved some moderate success. I know. Fuck me. My bad. So, let’s do it again! Cleo Lemon is up for FedEx player of the week. He’s up against some stiff competition. And most of you like this guy about as much as rectal exam sans lubricants, so I’m doubting we’ll get the same response as we did with Teddy. But c’mon. I know he’s a shitty career backup quarterback who directs his passes like he’s throwing a baby. But still, he did lead us out of the void. So vote for him. Also, Cam is up for Motorola Coach of the Week. But I'm voting for Brian Billick.

*Despite all his denials, the Wayne Huizenga selling the Dolphins rumors refuse to die. Some say he wants out of the misery, others say it’s about the taxes, still others have said he values what the community thinks of him and doesn’t want to be known as the guy who killed the Dolphins. My thoughts on Huizenga: He’s a good owner. He just has had some really shitty luck while running this team. In a nutshell, he’s pretty much given us everything we’ve asked for within his power. He’s pretty much Robert Kraft but without the shitload of luck that has been dumped on that assbag's pasty white lap over the last few years. Jesus I fucking hate that fat fuck. So, let me know your thoughts. Should Wayne sell? Do you like Wayne? No? Why you no like Wayne?

*It looks like we may have lost Channing Crowder for the year.

And that’s enough of the seriousness around here. Let’s get back to the dick jokes and calling people douchebags….

So ... Cash Warren. What a douchebag!

Comments

[Jerry O]

My two cents on Wayne: I think he's a good guy who means well. But seems to be in way over his head as far as how to run a successful football team (on the field anyway). He's placed his trust in the wrong people and so,one win in the last 16 tries later, here we are.

I don't know much about this Ross guy. But I'm willing to bet that if he buys the team he'll fire everybody and bring in his own people. Which is what this team probably needs at this point.

[vman]

"Squeeze my Lemon til the juice runs down my leg!"

That's so wrong.....Fucking funny as hell....but wrong

Who the Hell is Dan Cook? Ah fuck him anyway.

But seriously. Wayne may be loyal to a fault. He is not willing to cut ties with people that have underperformed because of it.
The road to hell.....Blah blah
Needs to get a lot tougher on those he expects results from.

[The Dude]

Vman: It's supposed to be Dane not Dan (fixed). I apparently took typing lessons from you. Zing!

Also: http://youtube.com/watch?v=UHYzawb8s54&feature=related

[vman]

Dude,

I knew that one was coming :) but I couldn't resist. My typing does suck! still getting used to the whole opposable thumbs thing I guess.
Anyway, I don't get the whole Dane Cook thing either.
Maybe it's my age, but he's just not that funny.

Great stuff as always!

Oh Yeah, did you catch the blurp at the end of that crowder article about Jason Taylor tearing something in his foot?

[Dat RoRo Kid]

Can't help but agree with vman up there about good intentions.

Fact is, Wayne has always been real good about opening up his wallet and getting whatever he set his sights on. He's not very meddlesome and that's great for a coach and administration that knows what it's doing.

But look at nearly every fuckin' front office personnel of importance in that franchise:

http://www.miamidolphins.com/newsite/contacts/administration/administration.asp

Every single one of them A) are old and B)had their ENTIRE NFL career working for the Dolphins and the Dolphins alone. There's not one outside guy that could give some perspective on how other franchises run things (with the exception of the Muell). But Weidermeyer (sp?) and all those other dudes are lifetime Dolphin suits. To me, that breeds complacency. Those guys have been driving their luxury cars FOR YEARS to the facility in Davie. It's as ho-hum as it gets and it seems that under Wayne, there's no end to that in sight.

Everyone says the Dolphins are a world-class organization all that but I think people like the fact that there's no sense of urgency from the higher ups there. It's a fuckin' retirement village.

Think we need to bring in someone from the outside to shake things up a little and infuse some youth by giving promotions to other positions of prominence among front offices around the league (i.e. a young-ish VP of Player Personnel that really knows his/her shit).

Plus, my mommy said that if a Cuban takes control of the team he'll most likely give me a really good job!!!

[Dat RoRo Kid]

Plus, I've always had a thorn stuck in my side about the Dolphin Stadium naming rights. I know it's stupid but it should have always been JRS.

[Dat RoRo Kid]

...and don't get me started on what a shitty stadium it is.

(Though I haven't been there since the 'upgrades'. Dude, you might have some better perspective on this...'

[finfan1]

The new upgrades to the stadium are pretty sweet. And the naming rights this is pretty universal around the league. Hell, Candlestick is now Monster.com stadium. It's all about the $$$.

But I agree with Roro. There are a lot of people out there who flat out hate Wayne and accuse him of being greedy. But those people are missing the point. Like you said Dude, he's an owner that has gotten everything we could ask for.

But like Roro said, his decisions to keep certain people around too long and the whole good-old-boys network that pervades the whole organization has hurt more than help. We do need a shakeup. And I agree that if a new owner comes, he'll blow it all up and start from scratch.

That's what this team needs.

[The Dude]

When I went to the Jets game a couple of weeks ago, I sat in the Club level. So I got to see first hand the new renovations to the stadium. And I must say, it was prettay, prettay, prettay good. Also, the jumbotrons are the largest HD TVs anywhere in the world right now, which is pretty cool. All in all, I like what Wayne's done to the joint.

Except the whole $5.00 for a beer. That sucks ass.

[vman]

Wayne may bring someone in as a minority owner to eventually take over for him when he decides to retire or passes on.

That leaves me wondering how long, even with a new owner will it be status quo? How much say will the new owners have the first few years?

We may still have a few more years of the same old dinking around to deal with. However, I’m hoping that this 1 (+/-) win season is the board to the head (Tommy boy) that he needs to finally shake the dead wood loose from that front office tree!

[Another AFC Fan]

What's the plan on playing New England and taking them down?

Any hope on that one?

[Brigadier Pudding]

I don't blame Wayne for everything. A lot of it is bad luck. His wallet and heart were always in the right place.

BUT:

He was the guy that kept Wanny on as HC and didn't fire him until 2004 when it was patently obvious *two years* prior that the guy was an incompetent. Horrible drafts, bad personnel decisions, giving up draft picks like tic tacs, putting us in salary cap hell. The list goes on. Then at the end of the '03 season, he inexplicably promotes Wanny's equally incompetent friend Speilman as GM. We pretty much sabotaged the next decade or so of this football team. They are the root of almost every problem we have now. And Wayne would not get rid of them until severe, long term damage was done.

[Coral Gables Dave]

vman, it's not your age. He sucks. Period.

[Lady Phin]

I say hire the Dude as Owner...we'll raise money (i'll head up the wet t-shirt contest)...then the ladies and I will run down the streets of Miami with Corona bottles with "Donate to a Good cause" written on our asses with chocolate sauce...

Dude would have that cash in record time, right before the pen hit the paper for Hinezee-poo to sign over to Gilbert and Sullivan or whoever the hell those two guys are...

Mission accomplished...(Cam's Penis would be in charge of entertainment at halftime)

LP : )

[gersom]

Wayne H. really has been a good owner. Loyal to a fault? Yes. Willing to do what it takes to get a winning product? Yes.Wearing his heart on his sleeve for this... hey did you say chocolate sauce on your ass? YUMMY!!!!!!!!! Mymouth is watering already.

[JerryD]

Sorry, I believe Wayne Hire-Zingers is a horrible owner.

May be a good guy & spends money ... but makes continuous bonehead management moves ... that's DUMB, not BAD Luck.

The precise problem with Hire-Zingers is .. "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results."

Hire-Zingers would be the worst if it weren't for Bidwell of the Cardinals.

Sorry, can't think of any good Dolphins management moves ... then sticks with LOSERS way to long.

He also makes knee-jerk decisions on his extensive talent searches.

10 years of garbage convinced me, & I believe its a proven, objective assesment.